Click here to edit subtitle

Blog

Building a Relationship: Simple Things Matter

Posted by Cynthia Johnson on June 11, 2012 at 1:30 PM

Thirty years of research on successful love and marriage has taught us many things, but first and foremost – no love has blossomed or been sustained without doing the “simple things.” Big things don’t matter until your relationship has mastered the art of doing the simple things day in and day out in your relationship with another human being whom you purport to love.

 

All too often in life, people make assumptions about love and relationships that do not stand up under scrutiny – that are not supported by the available evidence. So, what are the facts?

One of the great misconceptions of all time about love and relationships is this – just do the big things and everything will turn out well. And what do the big things include? For starters the list includes “having financial stability in your relationship,” “being in love is all that matters,” “having a good job and a house in the suburbs,” and so it goes. But the truth is, these big things are important, but they are only a by-product of doing the simple things. Here’s what we mean.

It is an established fact – successful love is based on an accumulation of the simple things. If you want your marriage and your relationship to succeed, just do the simple things! Do them day in and day out. When your relationship has mastered the “simple things” you have a chance to make it work. You have a chance to make it last. But if you don’t, well, failure is an option.

There is another important fact of life when it comes to love and relationships – there will be big challenges to address in your relationships, of that you can be sure. You might have to deal with financial setbacks, serious illness, the loss of a job, or the death of a loved one. And trust us on this – if your relationship with the one you love has mastered the art of doing the simple things day in and day out, the likelihood of your relationship making it through the tough times are multiplied many times over.

So what are these simple things? Here are a few: always showing respect for the one you love; saying I love you many times a day; engaging in simple acts of kindness (breakfast in bed, flowers on non-special occasions; opening doors for them, etc.); giving your lover lots of daily hugs; treating them with courtesy at all times; helping clean up the dinner table; sharing financial decisions with them, and the list goes on.

The point is, simple things matter and when you practice doing them, they accumulate. Simple acts add up. And always remember, you can’t keep turning on then turning off doing the simple things. You have to consistently engage in doing the simple things day in and day out. When you do, you will be surprised at how well this simple notion works. Start engaging in them today.

______________________________________________________________________________________

By Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz

For hundreds of tips to enhance your relationship and essential marriage advice get the Doctor’s best-selling and multiple-award winning book Building a Love that Lasts (Jossey-Bass/Wiley)

Categories: Relationships

Post a Comment

Oops!

Oops, you forgot something.

Oops!

The words you entered did not match the given text. Please try again.

Already a member? Sign In

655 Comments

Reply sonzaras
12:27 PM on June 18, 2022 
stromectol for sale
Reply Wffhiche
4:35 PM on June 18, 2022 
essay template graphic organizer ikiru essay https://essayitis.com/
Reply hofbsdjc
3:21 PM on June 19, 2022 
buy ivermectin online
Reply Driesee
9:55 PM on June 19, 2022 
fda approved canadian online pharmacies meds without a doctor prescription
Reply Wrrhiche
11:22 AM on June 21, 2022 
university of chicago essay questions 2009 persuasive essay on anti gun control https://essayrightversion.com/
Reply qxgujfhe
1:20 AM on June 22, 2022 
stromectol 12mg for sale ivermectin 12mg stromectol 12mg online
Reply OpildSop
8:24 AM on June 23, 2022 
best place order viagra online http://bluethshop.com buy viagra capsules
Reply JbdgwamFearce
8:52 AM on June 23, 2022 
yellow journalism essay examples english essay formal letter format spm https://essayanalyticok.com/
Reply pepwjlhh
12:09 AM on June 24, 2022 
stromectol price us
Reply pluqnssw
12:52 AM on June 24, 2022 
generic ivermectin 6 mg stromectol 12mg online
Reply Driesee
6:54 AM on June 24, 2022 
walmart pharmacy dapoxetine
Reply Ecekenunk
5:46 AM on June 25, 2022 
essay about rising divorce rate in egypt descriptive essay on life in a city https://essaychekhere.com/
Reply aunmreas
10:30 PM on June 25, 2022 
generic stromectol 6mg
Reply Nmqzphype
5:22 AM on June 27, 2022 
cialis pills for sale how long can you keep cialis https://cialisandeds.com/
Reply eweefpaw
6:31 AM on June 27, 2022 
order stromectol over the counter generic stromectol 12 mg buy stromectol pills
Reply toicpcmt
11:01 AM on June 27, 2022 
generic ivermectin 12 mg
Reply qzcsddjt
12:40 AM on June 28, 2022 
http://ivermectinuni.com/ generic stromectol
Reply Jnndphype
5:37 AM on June 30, 2022 
viagra cream buy online buy viagra online canadian pharmacy https://gogiviagr.com/
Reply tourge
10:44 AM on June 30, 2022 
ivermectin tablets over counter ivermectin cream
Reply vroqjwtz
1:05 AM on July 1, 2022 
generic ivermectin 6mg

Oops! This site has expired.

If you are the site owner, please renew your premium subscription or contact support.